Paddy & Jimmy were walking along a street in London.
Paddy looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye.
The sign read, “Suits Pound 5.00 each, Shirts Pound 2.00 each, Trousers Pound 2.50 per pair”.
Paddy said to his pal, “Look at the prices! We could buy a whole lot of these, and when we get back to Scotland, we could make a fortune. Now, when we go in, you stay quiet, okay? Let me do all the talking cause if they hear our accents, they might think we are cheap Scotsmen and try to screw us. I’ll put on my best London accent.”
“OK, Paddy, I’ll keep my mouth shut,” said Jimmy.
They go in, and Paddy said in a posh voice, “Hello, my good man. I’ll take 50 suits at Pound 5.00 each, 100 shirts at Pound 2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at Pound 2.50 each. I’ll back up my truck, ready to load them on, old chap!”
The owner of the shop said quietly, “You’re from Scotland, aren’t you?”
“Well, yes,” said a surprised Paddy. “What gave it away?”
The owner replied, “This is a dry cleaners……..”
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An old French lady had a small shop in her village for years, until one day a huge corporate supermarket set up across the road from her little shop.
They put up signs advertising their prices, including one that said: “Butter – 10 Francs”
In response, the lady added a sign to her own window: “Butter – 9 Francs”
The next day, the big supermarket had a new sign: “Butter – 8 Francs”
Sure enough, the day after the lady’s sign now read: “7 Franc.”
This went on for a while, until eventually one of the lady’s customers pointed to the sign and said, “Madame, you cannot keep your prices so low for long. These big companies can use their buying power to sell products cheaper, but a little store like yours can never compete.”
In response, the old lady bent forward conspiratorially and muttered, “Monsieur, I don’t even sell butter.”
