So I was sitting on the bus just reading a book when somebody tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around and saw an old lady. She said to me, “Sonny, would you like some nuts? I’ve got a couple of...

Doctor (to the patient): "Did I not give you the medicine yesterday? Did you take it?" Patient: "Yes, sir. But I did not drink it." Doctor: "Why?" Patient (pointing to the bottle): "Because it is written on the label: 'Close the cork tightly...