An old man calls Pizza Hut to order a pizza.
Caller: Is this Pizza Hut?
GOOGLE: No sir, it’s Google Pizza.
CALLER: I guess I dialed the wrong number, sorry.
GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Pizza Hut last month.
CALLER: Okay. I would like to order a pizza.
GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir?
CALLER: My usual? Do you know me?
GOOGLE: According to our caller ID datasheet, in the last 12 calls you ordered an extra large pizza with three kinds of cheese, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.
CALLER: Great! That’s what I will have.
GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta, arugula, sun-dried tomatoes, and olives on a whole wheat gluten-free thin crust?
CALLER: What? I don’t want a vegetarian pizza!
GOOGLE: Your cholesterol is not good, sir.
CALLER: How do you know that?
GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records. We have your blood test results for the last 7 years.
CALLER: Okay, but I don’t want your rotten vegetarian pizza! I already take medication for my cholesterol.
GOOGLE: Excuse me, sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly. According to our database, you only bought a box of 30 cholesterol tablets once at Lloyds Pharmacy, 4 months ago.
CALLER: I bought some more from another Pharmacy.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.
CALLER: I paid in cash.
GOOGLE: But you didn’t withdraw enough money according to your bank statement.
CALLER: I have other sources of cash.
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your latest tax returns unless you bought them using an undeclared income source, which is against the law!
CALLER: WHAT THE !!!
GOOGLE: I’m sorry sir, we only use this information for the sole purpose of helping you.
CALLER: Enough already! I’m sick to the death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, and all the others. I’m going to an island without the internet, or TV, where there is no phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.
GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago…
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
