As a young married couple, a husband and a wife lived in a cheap housing complex near the base where he was working.
Their chief complaint was that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no privacy. This was painfully obvious when one morning the wife was upstairs and the husband was downstairs on the telephone. He was interrupted by the doorbell and went to greet his neighbor.
“Give this to your wife,” he said thrusting a roll of toilet paper into his hands. “She’s been yelling for it for 20 minutes!”
===============================================
My neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn.
He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair.He said with excitement, “You appear quite elderly to be driving.”
“Well, yes, I am,” she replied proudly. “I’ll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough, that I don’t even need a driver’s license anymore.”
He asked “How do you know?”
“The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver’s license. I told him, yes and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying, ‘You won’t need this anymore.’ So I thanked him and left!”
===============================================
Two neighbors are talking to each other.
First neighbor: Do you know that my dog is so smart, he waits for the newspaper to drop at the doorstep and then delivers it to me?
Second neighbor: Of course, I know that very well.
First neighbor: Really, well then, how?
Second neighbor: My dog came and told me.
===============================================
Willy: “Mom, are our neighbors very poor people?”
Mother: “I don’t think so, Willy. Why do you ask?”
Willy: “Because they made such a fuss when their baby swallowed a coin.”
