Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she screamed, “Pa! You need to go out and fix the outhouse!”
Pa replies, “There is nothing wrong with the outhouse.”
Ma yells back, “Yes there is, now git out there and fix it.”
So Pa mosies out to the outhouse, looks around, and yells back, “Ma! There ain’t nothing wrong with the outhouse!”
“Ma replies, “Stick your head in the hole!”
Pa yells back, “I ain’t sticking my head in that hole!”
“Ma says, “You have to put your head in the hole to see what you can fix.”
With that, Pa sticks his head in the hole, looks around, and yells back, “Ma! There ain’t nothing wrong with this outhouse!”
Ma hollers back, “Now take your head out of the hole!”
Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, then starts yelling, “Ma! Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!”
To which Ma replies, “Hurts, don’t it?!”
LOL!!
A 70-year-old woman chose to remain overnight in a costly hotel
A 70-year-old woman decided to stay at an expensive hotel for her birthday.
The next morning, she was appalled when the desk clerk gave her a bill for $250.00. She wanted to know why the charge was too high.
“It’s a nice hotel, but the rooms certainly aren’t worth $250.00 for just an overnight stay! I didn’t even have breakfast,” she told the clerk.
The clerk clarified that $250.00 is the standard price. At that point, the older lady insisted on talking with the manager.
The manager introduced himself and explained that the hotel “has an Olympic size swimming pool and a huge conference center which are available for use.”
“But I didn’t use them,” the old woman said.
“Well, they’re there and you could have,” he replied.
The manager proceeded with that she could likewise have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous.
“We have the best entertainers from the world over performing here,” he said.
“But I didn’t go to any of those shows,” she said.
The manager replied, “Well, we have them and you could have.”
Regardless of what facility he recommended, the older lady would just answer, “But I didn’t use it!”
The manager then replied with his standard reaction. After arguing with him for several minutes, she decided to pay.
The manager was shocked when she handed him the check. “But ma’am, this check is only $50.00,” he said.
“That’s right. I charged you $200.00 for s-l.e.e.p.i.n.g with me,” replied the old lady.
“But I didn’t!” the manager shouted.
“Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have,” the old woman replied.
Don’t mess with Senior Citizens, they spent a lifetime learning the skills… !!!
Hope this funny story will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
