Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant.
“I was in that new restaurant across the street,” said one.
“It’s so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere–it’s so sanitary that the whole place shines.”
“Please,” said the other roach frowning. “Not while I’m eating!”
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A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table.
He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her.
Suddenly, she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man.
He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
“Oh my, I am so sorry,” the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.
“Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you,” she says.
They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap ……… and stay for breakfast. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed!! Everything had been SO incredible!!!!
“You know,” he said, “you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?”.
“No,” she replies, “You just happened to catch my eye.”
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Couple in 5-star restaurant
A husband and wife were dining at a 5-star restaurant.
When their food arrived, the husband said: “Our food has arrived! Let’s eat!”
His wife reminded him: “Honey, you always say your prayers at home before your dinner!”
Her husband replied: “That’s at home, my dear. Here the chef knows how to cook…”
