Three guys stranded on a desert island,
find a magic lantern containing a genie who grants them each one wish.
The first guy wishes he is off the island and back home.
The second guy wishes the same.
The third guy says, “I’m lonely. I wish my friends are back here.”
Three guys are at a restaurant, all with their girlfriends.
The first guy, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, “Could you pass me the honey?…Honey.”
Now, the second guy, copying the first, says to his girlfriend, “Could you pass me the sugar?…Sugar.”
So now, the third guy is under pressure. He has to come up with something good.
After, a minute of thinking he says to his girlfriend, “Pass me the pork…pig.”
A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing.
On the last day the departing manager tells him, “I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if you encounter a crisis you can’t solve.”
Three months down the track there is major drama, everything goes wrong – the usual stuff – and the manager feels very threatened by it all.
He remembers the parting words of his predecessor and opens the first envelope. The message inside says “Blame your predecessor!”
He does this and gets off the hook.
About half a year later, the company is experiencing a dip in sales, combined with serious product problems.
The manager quickly opens the second envelope. The message read, “Reorganize!”
This he does, and the company quickly rebounds.
Three months later, at his next crisis, he opens the third envelope.
The message inside says “Prepare three envelopes…”
An Awesome Time
A young man showed up to his date’s house and told her they were going to have “an awesome time” that evening.
“What are we doing?” she asked.
“I got three tickets to a concert.”
“Why would we need three tickets?” his date asked.
“The tickets are for your parents and sister.”
