A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom.
First he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever.
Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there’s a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers.
Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there’s a large limo line at the rental office, but he’s patient and gets the job done.
Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time.
When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there’s no punchline.
A physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist discuss what is better: a wife or a girlfriend.
The physicist: “A girlfriend. You still have freedom to experiment.”
The mathematician: “A wife. You have security.”
The computer scientist: “Both. When I’m not with my wife, she thinks I’m with my girlfriend. With my girlfriend, it’s vice versa. And I can be with my computer without anyone disturbing me…”
No no for jewelry
As a man serviced an alarm system at a jewelry store recently, the saleswoman let him know that the store was having a 20 percent off sale.
“I bet your girlfriend would love it if you bought her something,” she suggested.
“I don’t have a girlfriend,” he answered.
“A handsome man like you and you don’t have a girlfriend? Why not?”
“My wife won’t let me.”
A guy takes his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time.
After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game.
“Oh, I really liked it”, she said, “but I just couldn’t understand though why they were beating each other up for 25 cents.”
Surprised, the boyfriend asked: “What do you mean?”
The blonde girlfriend replied all they kept screaming was: “Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!”