After a long day of navigating the chaos of her office and battling traffic, Maya finally stepped onto the crowded metro, hoping to zone out on her way home.
She found a spot to stand, gripping the pole with one hand, and closed her eyes, ready to let the train’s gentle rocking lull her into relaxation.
But just as she was starting to settle, a man standing next to her pulled out his phone and began speaking so loudly, it was like he wanted the entire car to know his business.
“Hey babe, it’s Mike. I’m on the train,” he boomed.
“Yeah, I know it’s 6:30, not 4:30, but the meeting went long.”
“No, seriously, I wasn’t with Jessica from HR. I was with the CEO, I swear.”
“Of course, you’re the only one for me, baby. I promise.”
The conversation went on and on, his voice cutting through the noise of the train, making everyone within earshot wince with discomfort.
Maya, her patience running thin, decided to take action. She moved closer, leaned in, and in the most exaggerated, overly affectionate voice, spoke directly into his phone:
“Mike, honey, why are you still on the phone? Come back to bed, I miss you!”
The whole train car erupted in laughter, and Mike’s face went from deep red to a shade of crimson that would make a tomato jealous. He quickly hung up and avoided eye contact with anyone for the rest of the ride.
From that day forward, Mike learned the value of quiet public spaces.
A man got a job selling toothbrushes
A man was down on his luck and in desperate need of a job.
He saw an advertisement in the newspaper for a job in sales. He didn’t know anything about sales but figured he could learn, so he contacted the company.
“It’s very simple,” said the hiring manager. “You go door-to-door selling toothbrushes. Everyone needs a toothbrush, you should be able to sell lots of them.”
The man agreed and went out to a large housing tract for the day. When he returned to the office, he was asked how his day went.
“I sold one toothbrush,” he said.
The hiring manager was not happy. “Look, I know it’s your first day in sales, so I’ll forgive it this time. But you gotta sell more than one if you want to keep your job.”
The next day, the man went to another neighborhood. When he returned to the office at the end of the day, he said, “I sold two toothbrushes today!”
Now the hiring manager was furious. “It is far from enough! You have one more day to get this right. If you don’t sell a lot more tomorrow, you’re fired.”
When the man came back to the office at the end of the next day, he was again asked how he did. “I sold 1500 toothbrushes!” he announced.
“Oh my God!” said the hiring manager. “That’s amazing. It’s more than anyone has ever sold in one day before. How did you do it?”
“Well,” he began, “I went to a grocery store and set up a table outside with some chips and some dip. And I asked people to try them. They would taste it and say, ‘This dip tastes like s-h.it!”
And I would say, “It is! Would you like to buy a toothbrush?”
LOL!! A dumb joke is still a good, funny joke!
