Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school.
He decided to come back to the small town because he could be a big man in this small town. He really wanted to impress everyone. He opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first.
One day, he saw a man coming up the sidewalk to his office. He decided to make a big impression on this new client when he arrived. As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the phone.
He motioned the man in, all the while saying, “No. Absolutely not. You tell those clowns in New York that I won’t settle this case for less than $1 million. Yes. The appeals court has agreed to hear that case next week. I’ll be handling the primary argument, and the other members of my team will provide support. Okay. Tell the DA that I’ll meet with him next week to discuss the details.”
This sort of thing went on for almost five minutes. All the while, the man sat patiently as Joe rattled instructions. Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man.
“I’m sorry for the delay,” he said, “but as you can see, I’m very busy. What can I do for you?”
The man replied, “I’m from the phone company. I came to hook up your phone.”
Life was good at the Smiths. It was just another day.
Suddenly, shouts were heard from inside the house. The wife was shouting at Bob, her husband.
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry.
She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!”
The next morning he got up early and left for work.
When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday.
A young couple got married and went away on their honeymoon.
After two weeks, they came back and finally opened all the presents they had received from friends and family. Since this was a new house, the process took some time.
A week later, they received in the mail two tickets for a very popular show. They were very excited and warmed by the gesture of the host. Inside the envelope, however, was only a small piece of paper with a single line, “Guess who sent them?”
The pair had much fun trying to identify the donor, but failed in the effort. They went to the theatre, and had a wonderful time. On their return home late at night, still trying to guess the identity of the unknown host, they found the house stripped of every article of value.
And on the bare table in the dining room was a piece of paper on which was written in the same hand as the enclosure with the tickets: “Now you know!”
