Husband and wife went shopping to get new dresses for the wife.
After seeing numerous dresses, she shortlisted around 100 and further brought it down to 25. Out of these, she asked her husband to choose 5 dresses among them. Then she finally picked up one dress. It took 5 hours to finalise one dress.
The husband settled the bill and commented, “Adam was very lucky because he and Eve used to wear only leaves. He need not have wasted too much of time.”
Ultimate comment of wife, “Who knows how many trees Adam had to climb and finally choose the leaves as per the wish of Eve. You are lucky… you have to just sit in AC shop…”
Moral: Never argue with a woman while shopping.
================================
I let my wife borrow the BMW today…
I told her to be careful, there’s plenty of idiots on the road.
Sure enough about 15 minutes later on the radio; I hear that there’s a car driving on the wrong side of the road in my area.
I gave her a call: Be careful love, someone’s driving on the wrong side of the road.
Wife: Someone is…? EVERYONE IS!
================================
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.
After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.
In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I’m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?”
The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye, says, ” I have a better idea, just for tonight, let’s make pretend that were married.”
The man says happily, “OK!” AWESOME!”
The woman says, “GOOD …. get your own darn blanket!!!”
================================
A young man and a young woman were soon to be married, but they both had a problem they had never told anyone else about.
The man approached his father one day before the wedding and told him about his problem. His feet really stunk, even if he washed them constantly. He was worried that this would scare off his new bride, so he needed a solution, fast. His father pondered the situation and finally told his son to wear socks constantly (even to bed) and always wash his feet whenever he got a chance. The son thought about this and went along happy.
The same day the young lady approached her mother and told her about her problem. Her morning breath was horrid. Her mother reassured her and told her everyone had bad morning breath. The young woman told her mother that this was not normal morning breath but easily the worst in the world. The mother thought about this and came up with this bright idea. She told her daughter to get up earlier than everyone else and don’t say a thing, go make breakfast and then brush her teeth while others are eating. The young woman thought and then ran off to get ready for the wedding, happy.
The couple is married and they are happy, him with his perpetual socks and her with her morning silences. One morning about 5:30 am the young man wakes up to find one sock missing. He starts rustling around in the bed looking for it, which of course wakes up his wife, who without thinking asks what’s wrong.
With a look of shock on his face, the young man says, “Oh my God, you’ve swallowed my sock!”
