A group of army officers was sent to another town for a training camp.
Before leaving, the rest of them decided to pull a fast one on one of the officers. They put a pack of condoms in his bag without him noticing it.
When he got home, his wife unpacked the bag and found condoms.
When confronted, he realized the joke and said, “We all got it as a gift. I didn’t use mine… others did.”
For the last 2 weeks, the whole cantonment is in turmoil….. Other wives are demanding details.
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Three Soldiers had just gotten out of the Army and decided to celebrate by taking a helicopter ride.
One of the soldiers is eating a banana and says, “I wonder if we’d be able to see it land, if I threw the peel out?” Out goes the peel and they all watch it but don’t see it land.
One of the others has a rock and says “This is bigger, we should be able to see it land.” They all watch, but don’t see it land.
The last one takes a grenade out of his pocket, pulls the pin and tosses it out of the door.
“We’ll see that when it hits.” They watch, but still nothing.
Walking home they see a little girl crying and they ask, what’s wrong?
“Well I was walking and slipped on a banana peel that came from nowhere.”
The soldiers explain what happened and are helping the girl home when they see a little boy sitting on the side of the road holding his head. They ask what happened?
“I was walking when a rock hit me on the head.”
They tell the story again and start to wonder what happened to the grenade.
One of them races ahead and sees an old lady laughing hysterically. He asks what’s so funny?
The old lady says, “I just farted and my house blew up!!”
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A kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out something exciting and relate it to the class the next day.
When the time came to present what they’d found, the first little boy the teacher called on walked up to the front of the class, and with a piece of chalk, made a small white dot on the blackboard and sat back down.
Puzzled, the teacher asked him what it was. ‘It’s a period,’ he replied.
‘I can see that,’ said the teacher, ‘but what is so exciting about a period?’
‘Darned if I know,’ chirped the little boy, ‘but this morning my sister was missing one, my mother fainted, my dad had a heart attack, and the boy next door joined the Navy!’
