A man walks into a chemist’s and says,
“Can I have a bar of soap, please?”
The chemist says, “Do you want it scented?”
And the man says, “No, I’ll take it with me now.”
A woman was waiting in the check-out line at a shopping center.
Her arms were laden with a mop and broom and other cleaning supplies.
By her actions and deep sighs, it was obvious she was in an extreme hurry and was not happy about the slowness of the line When the cashier called for a price check on a box of soap, the woman remarked indignantly, “Well, I’ll be lucky to get out of here and home before Christmas!”
“Don’t worry, ma’am,” replied the clerk. “With that wind kicking up out there and that brand new broom you have there, you’ll be home in no time.”
Three professors (a physicist, a chemist, and a statistician) are called in to see their dean.
Just as they arrive the dean is called out of his office, leaving the three professors there.
The professors see with alarm that there is a fire in the wastebasket.
The physicist says, “I know what to do! We must cool down the materials until their temperature is lower than the ignition temperature and then the fire will go out.”
The chemist says, “No! No! I know what to do! We must cut off the supply of oxygen so that the fire will go out due to lack of one of the reactants.”
While the physicist and chemist debate what course to take, they both are alarmed to see the statistician running around the room starting other fires.
They both scream, “What are you doing?!?”
“Trying to get an adequate sample size!”
Collecting coupons
Ms. Warner: “Well, how are you getting on in your new eight room house?”
Ms. Kyle: “Oh, not so badly. We furnished one of the bedrooms by collecting soap coupons.”
Ms. Warner: “Didn’t you furnished the other seven rooms?”
Ms. Kyle: “We can’t. They are full of the soap.”
