A man has been hospitalized for a month. One day, he’s so tired of being in the hospital that he sneaks into the nearest pub.
He orders a beer and swallows the flat quantity in ten seconds. Then he orders a second beer and does the same. Then a third and a fourth.
As he orders the fifth beer, he says to the barman, “I shouldn’t be drinking this with what I’ve got.”
The barman gasps in alarm, “What have you got?”
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To which the hospital patient replies, “I’ve got no money.”
Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown.
Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.
“Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep are here, can I keep one?”
The shepherd is puzzled but agrees. She blurts out “352!”
He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep.
“I’ll take this one,” she says proudly. “It’s the cutest!”
“Hey lady,” says the shepherd, “If I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?”
Why did the man know she was blonde?
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