A guy takes his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time.
After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game.
“Oh, I really liked it”, she said, “but I just couldn’t understand though why they were beating each other up for 25 cents.”
Surprised, the boyfriend asked: “What do you mean?”
The blonde girlfriend replied all they kept screaming was: “Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!”
A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher for 16 – 18 year olds.
She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun, kicking a football.
She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him.
‘Are you ok?’ she asks.
‘Yes,’ he replies.
‘You can go and play with the other kids, you know,’ she says.
‘It’s best I stay here,’ he says.
‘Why’s that, sweetie?’ asks the blonde..
The boy looks at her incredulously and says:
“Because I’m the goal keeper!”
Football Fan
A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t excited about the Super Bowl. “It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?”
“Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student.
“Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were dumb fools? What would you be then?”
“Then I’d be a football fan.”
Three guys are at a restaurant, all with their girlfriends.
The first guy, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, “Could you pass me the honey?…Honey.”
Now, the second guy, copying the first, says to his girlfriend, “Could you pass me the sugar?…Sugar.”
So now, the third guy is under pressure. He has to come up with something good.
After, a minute of thinking he says to his girlfriend, “Pass me the pork…pig.”
A retired couple had dinner at their friends’ house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went to the kitchen.
The two men were talking and one said, “We’ve been going to a new restaurant and it’s really great. I’d recommend it very highly.”
The other man asked, “What’s the name of the place?”
The first man thought awhile and finally said, “What are those flowers you send a woman you love? The ones with red petals and thorns?”
“You must mean roses,” he replied.
“That’s it,” said the man.
He yelled to his wife, “Rose, what’s the name of the restaurant we like?”
