A Drunk Man Stumbles Out of A Bar and sees two priests walking across the street.
He staggers toward the two priests and stops in front of them.
He turns to the first priest and proudly says, “I’m Jesus Christ!”
The first priest shakes his head and replies, “No, son, you’re not.”
He then turns to the second priest and says again, “I’m Jesus Christ!”
Again, the second priest replies, “No, son, you’re not.”
The drunk man finally says, “Follow me, I’ll prove it to you!”
Curious, the two priests follow behind him as he walks back into the bar.
Immediately upon entering, the bartender takes one look at the man and says, “Jesus Christ, you’re here again?!”
Two boys go camping
Two boys go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they’ve forgotten a bottle opener.
The first boy turns to the second and says, “You’ve gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer.”
“No way,” says the second. “By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food.”
“I promise I won’t do It,” says the Newfie. “Just hurry!”
Nine full days pass and there’s still no sign of the second boy. Exasperated and starving, the first Newfie digs into the sandwiches.
…
..
.
Suddenly, the second boy pops out from behind a rock and yells, “I knew it! I’m not freaking going!”
