The choir director selected the 6-year-old little boy with the sweetest face for the opening scene of the Christmas play.
“Now,all you have to do, when you hear me say to the choir ‘…and the angel lit the candle’, is come on stage and light all the candles.”
“I can do it, I can do it!” the little boy said, excitedly.
Rehearsals came and went, and finally the big night arrived. The choir was ready, the stage was beautifully decorated with dozens of unlit candles all around, and all awaited the moment when the cute littlest angel would make his entrance.
The director gave the downbeat, the orchestra began to play, and the choir swept into the introductory lines, ending with an expectant “…and the angel lit the candle” Everyone looked stage right for the entrance.
No little boy.
The director gave the downbeat again, and more loudly said, “…and the angel lit the candle”
Again, all eyes looked stage right. No little boy.
The director, beginning to sweat, motioned with great, sweeping gestures, and this time the choir thundered into the line. So loud were they that the curtains belled slightly from the sound!
“…AND THE ANGEL LIT THE CANDLE!”
And into the silence which followed came a clear, boy-soprano voice floating piercingly from stage right, “…and the cat peed on the matches!”
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A little boy opened the big, old family Bible with fascination and looked at the old pages as he turned them.
Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages.
“Momma, look what I found,” the boy called out.
“What have you got there, dear?” his mother asked.
With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered: “I think it’s Adam’s suit!”
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A little boy was afraid of the dark.
One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom.
The little boy turned to his mother and said: “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.”
The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. “You don’t have to be afraid of the dark,” she explained. “Jesus is out there. He’ll look after you and protect you.”
The little boy looked at his mother with a confused stare and asked: “Are you sure he’s out there?”
“Yes, I’m sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him,” she said.
The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little.
Peering out into the darkness, he called: “Jesus? If you’re out there, would you please hand me the broom?”
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It’s Christmas time and Paddy and Maddy decided to go look for a Christmas Tree.
They gathered their axe, a sled, and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them. When they finally reach a fine stand of trees, Maddy brushes off the first tree, and stands back with Paddy to look at it.
“Well, Paddy, What do you think?”
“Sorry, Maddy, this tree won’t do. Let’s try another one”.
They come upon another nice tree, Shaun brushes it off, and they both look at it.
“How about this one, Paddy?”
“Not quite, Maddy. Let’s keep looking”.
This goes on until nightfall. Both Paddy and Maddy are cold, tired, and hungry.
“Well, Paddy, what do we do now?”
“Maddy, I think we should take home the next tree we find, whether it has lights on it or not…”
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On the sixth day, God turned to the Archangel Gabriel and said,
“Today I am going to create a land called Canada. It will be a land of outstanding natural beauty. It shall have tall majestic mountains full of mountain goats and eagles, beautiful sparkling lakes bountiful with bass and trout, forests full of elk and moose, high cliffs over-looking sandy beaches with an abundance of sea life, and rivers stocked with salmon.”
God continued, “I shall make the land rich in resources so as to make the inhabitants prosper, I shall call these inhabitants Canadians, and they shall be known as the most friendly people on the earth.”
“But Lord,” asked Gabriel, “don’t you think you are being too generous to these Canadians??”
“Not really,” replied God. “Just wait and see the winters I am going to give them!”
