Worried that his son was spending too much money on dates, Jay’s Father asked how much his last date had cost.
Jay calculated a minute, then replied, “Oh, about $15 or so, I think.”
“Well,” said his Father, “I’m proud of you for finally coming up with an inexpensive evening.”
“To be honest, Dad,” Jay went on, “we’d have done more, but that was all the money she had.”
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Smith went on a date in a brand new Range Rover Sport ride with his new girlfriend of 1 month….
Smith: I have been hiding a secret from you, and I think you’ll break up with me if I tell you the truth.
Girl: What is that, my love?
Smith: I’m already married and have 3 kids….
Girl: (Pat him on the lap and hissed) You scared a Hell out of me… I thought you wanted to say this beautiful car is not yours….
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After four years of separation, a man and his wife finally divorced amicably.
He wanted to date again, but he had no idea of how to start, so he decided to look in the personals column of the local newspaper.
After reading through all the listings, he circled three that seemed possible in terms of age and interest, but he put off calling them.
Two days later, there was a message on his answering machine from his ex-wife:
“I came over to your house to borrow some tools today and saw the ads you circled in the paper. Don’t call the one in the second column. It’s me.”
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An Awesome Time
A young man showed up to his date’s house and told her they were going to have “an awesome time” that evening.
“What are we doing?” she asked.
“I got three tickets to a concert.”
“Why would we need three tickets?” his date asked.
“The tickets are for your parents and sister.”
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A boy was feeling very nervous about his first date, and so went to his father for advice.
“My son, there are three subjects that always work with women: food, family, and philosophy.”
The boy picks up his date, and they stare at each other for a long time. The boy’s nervousness builds, but he then remembers his father’s advice and asks the girl:
“Do you like potato pancakes?”
“No,” comes the answer, and the silence returns like a suffocating blanket.
“Do you have a brother?”
“No.”
After giving it some thought, the boy plays his last card:
“If you had a brother, would he like potato pancakes?”
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