The orthopedic surgeon Joe work for was moving to a new office, and his staff was helping transport many of the items.
Joe sat the display skeleton in the front of his car, his bony arm across the back of his seat. Joe hadn’t considered the drive across town.
At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside him became obvious, and he looked across and explained, “I’m delivering him to my doctor’s office.”
The other driver leaned out of his window. “I hate to tell you, lady,” he said, “but I think it’s too late!”
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Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.
The first said, “I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered.”
The second said, “I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order.”
The third said, “I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded.”
The fourth surgeon said, “I like technicians. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end.”
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A new business was opening and one of the owner’s friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, which said: “Rest in Peace.” The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied: “Sir, I’m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this – somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying:
“Congratulations on your new location!”
