Two men went bear hunting.
While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear.
He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.
He ran pretty fast but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step.
Just as he reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.
The man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, “You skin this one while I go and get another one!”
A guy from New Jersey went hunting one day in New York and bagged three ducks.
He put them in the bed of his pickup truck and was about to drive home when he was confronted by an ornery game warden who didn’t like people from New Jersey.
The game warden ordered the guy to show his hunting license, and the guy from Jersey pulled out a valid New York hunting license.
The game warden looked at the license, then reached over and picked up one of the ducks, sniffed its butt, and said, “This duck ain’t from New York, This is a Pennselvanya duck. You got a Pennselvanya huntin’ license, boy?”
The guy from New Jersey reached into his wallet and produced a Pennselvania hunting license.
The game warden looked at it, then reached over and grabbed the second duck, sniffed its butt, and said “This ain’t no Pennselvaina duck, This duck’s from Rhode Island. You got a Rhode Island license?” The guy from New Jersey reached into his wallet and produced a Rhode Island hunting license.
The warden then reached over and picked up the third duck, sniffed its butt, and said, “This ain’t no Rhode Island duck. This here duck’s from Massachuess. You got a Massachuess huntin’ license?” Again the guy from New Jersey reached into his wallet and brought out a Massachuess hunting license
The game warden was extremely frustrated at this point, and he yelled at the newfie “Just where the hell are you from?”
The guy from New Jersey turned around, bent over, dropped his pants and said, “You tell me, you’re the expert.”
