A woman brought a very limp duck to a veterinary surgeon.
As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and said sadly, “I’m sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.”
The distressed woman wailed, “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure. Your duck is dead,” the vet replied.
“How can you be so sure?” she protested. “I mean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.”
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around, and left the room.
A few minutes later, he returned with a black Labrador Retriever.
As the duck’s owner looked on in amazement, the dog reared up on its hind legs, put its front paws on the examination table, and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.
He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.
A few minutes later, he returned with a cat.
The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot.
The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly, and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.”
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill.
“$150!” she cried, “$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!”
The vet shrugged, “I’m sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the CAT scan, it’s now $150.”
A Duck Walks Into A Store One Day
One day, a duck walks into a store and asks the manager if they sell grapes.
The manager says, “No, we don’t sell grapes.”
The duck goes home and comes back the next day and asks the same question.
The manager repeats the same thing, “No, we don’t sell grapes”.
The duck goes home, comes back the next day, and asks the manager if they sell grapes.
This time the manager says, “No, we don’t sell grapes! If you ask again, I’ll nail your beak to the ground!”
The duck goes home. It comes back the next day and asks the manager if he has any nails.
The manager says, “No, I don’t have any nails.”
The duck says, “Okay, that’s good. Do you sell grapes?”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
