I ran into a buddy last month and invited him to a party.
He said, “No, thanks. I don’t go to parties anymore. It’s too embarrassing.“
“What do you mean?“
“Well, I always drink too much, and when I’m drunk I think it’s funny to piss in peoples’ flower pots. Then the next day, everybody’s talking about it, and it’s too embarrassing. So I just don’t go anymore.”
I said, “Geez, that’s bizarre behavior. You should see a shrink!”
“Yeah, maybe I should,”
Fast forward to last night, I ran into him at a party. I asked him, “Hey, so you took my advice?”
He said, “Yeah, I went and saw a shrink. So now I can go to parties again.”
“So you’re not pissing in flower pots anymore?”
…
..
.
“Oh no, I still do that. Now I just don’t care.
Two Virginia rednecks go on a fishing trip.
Two Virginia rednecks go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment.
On the first day, they go fishing, but they don’t catch anything.
The same thing happens on the second day and on the third day.
It goes on like this until finally, on the last day of their vacation, one of the men catches a fish.
As they’re driving home they’re really depressed.
One guy turns to the other and says, “Do you realize that this one lousy fish we caught cost us fifteen hundred bucks?”
…
..
.
The other guy says, “Wow! Then it’s a good thing we didn’t catch anymore!”
