A group of people
were touring a university campus and they noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand.
“What are they doing?” a woman asked the tour guide.
“Each year,” he replied with a grin, “The upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard.”
When we were out of earshot of the freshmen, the woman asked the guide: “So what’s the answer?”
The guide replied, “One.”
Class apart
It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: “Will the students who are parked on university drive please move their cars so that we may begin plowing?”
Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: “Will the 200 students who went to move 26 cars please return to class?”
A young banker decides to take a day off from his stressful job
and goes back to visit some of his professors at his old university.
As he enters the university, he sees a dog attacking a small child.
The banker quickly jumps on the dog and strangles it.
The next day, the local paper runs the story with the headline “Valiant student saves boy from vicious dog.”
When the banker sees the paper, he calls the editor of the paper and strongly suggests that a correction be printed, pointing out that he’s no longer a student, but a successful banker.
The next day, the paper issues a correction, with a headline saying, “Pompous banker k*lls university mascot.”
Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one said,
“Where did you get such a great bike?”
The second engineer replied,
“Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to the ground, took *ff all her clothes and said, “Take what you want.”
The first engineer nodded approvingly and said,
“Good choice: The clothes probably wouldn’t have fit you anyway.”
