Walter took Ethel to the state fair every year, and every time he would say to her, “Ethel, you know that I’d love to go for a ride in that helicopter.” But Ethel would always reply, “I know that Walter, but that helicopter ride is 50 dollars and 50 dollars is 50 dollars.”
Finally, they went to the fair, and Walter said to Ethel, “Ethel, you know I’m 87 years old now. If I don’t ride that helicopter this year, I may never get another chance.” Once again Ethel replied, “Walter, you know that helicopter is 50 dollars and 50 dollars is 50 dollars.”
This time the helicopter pilot overheard the couple’s conversation and said, “Listen, folks, I’ll make a deal with you. I’ll take both of you for a ride; if you can both stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word I won’t charge you! But if you say just one word, it’s 50 dollars.” Walter and Ethel agreed and up they went in the helicopter.
The pilot performed all kinds of fancy moves and tricks, but not a word was said by either Walter or Ethel. The pilot did his death-defying tricks over and over again, but still, there wasn’t so much as one word said. When they finally landed, the pilot turned to Walter and said, “Wow! I’ve got to hand it to you. I did everything I could to get you to scream or shout out, but you didn’t. I’m really impressed!” Walter replied, “Well, to be honest, I almost said something when Ethel fell out but, you know, 50 dollars is 50 dollars!”
===============================================
Eleven people were hanging on a rope under a helicopter, ten men and one woman.
The rope was not strong enough to carry them all, so they decided that one had to drop off, otherwise they were all going to fall.
They were not able to choose that person, but then the woman made a very touching speech.
She said that she would voluntarily let go of the rope, because as a woman she was used to giving up everything for her husband and kids, without ever getting anything in return.
As soon as she finished her speech, all the men started clapping their hands.
===============================================
The woman was very rich and the man was poor but honest.
She liked him, but that was all, and he knew it.
One night he had been a little more tender than usual. “You are very rich,” he ventured.
“Yes,” she replied frankly, I’m worth 1.25 million dollars.”
“And I’m poor,” he replied. “Will you marry me?”
“No.”
“I thought you would say no.”
“Then why did you ask me?”
“Oh, just to see how a man feels when he loses 1.25 million dollars.”
===============================================
A young man excitedly tells his mother that he’s fallen in love and that he is going to get married.
He says, “Ma, I’m going to bring over three women, and you try and guess which one I’m going to marry.”
The mother agrees.
The next day, he brings three beautiful women to the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while. Later, he says, “Okay Ma, guess which one I’m going to marry?”
She immediately replies, “The one on the right.”
“That’s amazing, Ma! You’re right. How did you know?”
The mother replies, “I don’t like her.”
