Two gas company servicemen,
a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighbourhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.
Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger co-worker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.
As they came running up to the truck, they realised the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.
Gasping for breath, she replied, “When I saw two men from the gas company running as hard as you two were, I figured I’d better run too!”
Two guys are out hiking.
All of a sudden, a bear starts chasing them.
They climb a tree, but the bear starts climbing up the tree after them.
The first guy gets his sneakers out of his knapsack and starts putting them on.
The second guy says, “What are you doing?”
He says, “I figure when the bear gets close to us, we’ll jump down and make a run for it.”
The second guy says, “Are you crazy? You can’t outrun a bear.”
The first guy says, “I don’t have to outrun the bear. I only have to outrun you.”
High prices of gas
Two people walk into a gas station.
The first one says, “These prices are awful. They just keep going higher!”
The second replies, “It doesn’t affect me at all. I always put in just $20 worth.”
A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race appear?”
The mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made.”
Two days later the girl asked her father the same question.
The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.”
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?”
The mother answered, “Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his.”